Sentiments (01/2025)

Where did you go that day? 

You disappeared without saying goodbye. 

Now, I sit outside the shops we knew, 

Watching the empty chair, waiting for you to come back and sit down across from me. 

Was it ever that bad? 

My looks, my mind, the way that I cared? 

The last time I saw your face, 

I was a puddle disregarded in the rain. 

But when you were gone, a part of me disappeared too. 

Today that puddle only dropped deeper, gaping its mouth to swallow me whole. 

It begs for us to come back. 

I sit where we used to talk, 

Think about how we used to talk, 

Let those memories bring you back to me: 

Your voice, a blanket to my frozen sorrows, 

Your smile, a reminder of why life is so beautiful, 

Your mind, a fantasy to get lost in forever.  

Now, I watch the leaves blow into the wind, 

Hear the same birds call to me, asking:

“Where’d all that time go?” 

I feel that cold bitter air remind me where I was before I could forget. 

Now, my family gives me looks when I stare into the void beyond their shoulders, 

My friends hear the same old stories get older and older, 

My brain wants to rest but I tell it, “We’ll rest when it’s all over.” 

But when will it end? 

When will I be able to frame you in my memories so I can move on?

You still haunt me. 

Sometimes, I hope that you miss me, 

But in reality, the only thing I hope for, is that I can find that part of me I cast out so long ago, and bring him the love I wished we had.